Thursday, November 11, 2010

november 11

i think im stuck somewhere between acceptance and disgust with myself.  i mean, i went through treatment a long time ago and had some major breakthroughs - then i went through a period where i didnt have the fight going so much in my head.  now it seems i like i flipflop constantly.  its real hard to explain.  i look around and see pics of how thin i used to be and wnt to be tht way again soooo bad, then the other voice says but you can pretty much eat what you want now and your holding steady, why do you want to do this to yourself again.  and i answer myself by saying, because i want to be beautiful again. im tired of the fat rolls and double chin and grossness all over.

only time will tell i suppose.

2 comments:

  1. hm that is a hard spot ot b in to have to totally different voices saying 2 totally different things
    but u have to do what is right fo ru
    stay strong hun

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  2. Hugs - I can empathise with you. Limbo land isn't fun.

    ReplyDelete